11 November 2004

虎口之痛

小痛慘過大病。

在公司整理稿件時,不小心被紙緣割破了手,傷在虎口,痛入心。從前也試過給割傷手指,痛一會兒便退了,但這次傷口在拇指和食指之間,一動一痛,好像有一根針刺入去似的。

回家馬上貼上膠布,固定了傷口,不痛了,我才驀然驚覺自己的懦弱。這一丁點的痛算什麼?我忽然便想起媽媽的痛楚,「像根長有倒刺的竹籤/穿過手掌,在生命中一抽一插」,那時候她天天叫痛,但不是繼續臉掛笑容地活著嗎?自己竟然連這少許的痛感也撐不住,誰說這一代受不起苦難,果然如是。

今天,傷口已好了,找不著痕跡。

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